Alert the historians because I have an undiagnosable case of... something... for the history books. Ah yes that's right, today I baffled doctor number four--so no one has any flipping idea why for two point five weeks the skin on my torso resembles that of a dragon. And it just keeps getting more exciting because it's refusing to behave like a normal diagnosable disease and is now spreading to extremities and my neck and scalp. Gross, right?
So I am at the doctor today and he is rattling off a list of things: Have you eaten...? Could you have been exposed to...? Did you change...? Nope, nope, nope.
Has there been any increased stress in your life? Like death of a loved one? Changes in living situation or family structure? Problems at work? Health issues? I notice you are getting married in may, has planning a wedding been at all stressful for you?
Um, let me think... check, check, check, check, check, and check. Yup, all of those... and to top it off... I HAVE THIS DAMN SKIN DISEASE THAT NO ONE CAN FIGURE OUT!!! I can't go out in public, i can only take one [COLD] shower a day and i smell like icky medicated lotions, I itch and hurt til i think i am going to lose my mind, and I am on and off steroids which have caused me to gain significant amounts of weight, oh, but i am not allowed to exercise because sweat irritates my 'condition' which, by the way, YOU STILL CANNOT IDENTIFY!!!!
Why, oh why, oh why would I be stressed?
So basically what it boils down to, because they cannot determine any other factors that may have caused it, they are currently attributing my 'condition' to stress.
So here's your daily dose of cruel, cruel Irony: This is my own doing, and will be my undoing...